got tomorrow off, and came home to pizza slices and resees pieces mmmmmm I feel like it’s friday
You know, funny story: There’s this craft store called Michaels. Look, my sister knits, and she goes to Michaels. So my sister called me and she’s like, “Oh my god, I’m at Michaels, picking up yarn. You have a poster at Michaels.” I’m like, “What?” She’s like, “There’s a poster, there’s a Falcon poster at Michaels.” I’m like, “Holy s**t!” She’s like, “I’m gonna come and pick you up, and we’re gonna see your poster in this store.” So she picks me up and we go to Michaels.
We go in, and I see the poster and I’m like, “Oh, this is….” She’s like, “I know, I know.” I said, “I’m gonna sign these posters.” I was like, “That would be amazing, you buy a poster and it’s like, actually signed by the Falcon.” Like, it would blow my mind. So I go to the front, I buy a Sharpie, I run back to the back of the store. And she’s like, “I’m gonna take a picture of you signing it.”
I’m in this store and I’m signing all the posters. The manager comes out, he’s like, “Hey, whatcha doing?” I was like, “Oh man, I’m signing these posters so when people buy ‘em, they’re signed.” He’s like, “Well, people are not gonna buy ‘em if they’re signed.” And I was like, “No, no, no, it’s cool. I’m pretty sure there won’t be a problem.” And he goes, “Yeah, but it is gonna be a problem, you’re messin’ up my inventory.” And I’m like, “No, my man, trust me. I mean, I’m the Falcon, that’s me!” And he goes, “Yeah, right. You’re gonna buy those posters.” I said, “What?” He’s like, “You’re gonna buy all those posters or I’m gonna call the police.”
He rolls up all the posters and goes to the front of the store. And I had to buy like 60 Falcon posters that I signed in Michaels.
|—||Anthony Mackie getting in trouble for signing his posters at a Micheals (x)|
cannot believe I’ve had the tab to the creepypasta wiki open for like an hour in the background and all of a sudden it loaded a subway video ad and scared the hell out of me
now that I’ve finally finished the millennium trilogy, I think I should finally catch up to game of thrones. I was like halfway through the fourth one but that was…over..a year ago. which means in all honesty I PROBABLY should reread at least from the second book ughhghg
I want a movie about a guy who runs for president and wins but then suddenly realizes that he doesn’t want to be president, so he just starts doing ridiculous things all the time trying to get impeached, but it NEVER WORKS because they always miraculously end up being the right thing to do. Like, he declares war on Canada? Next day it turns out that Canada had secret plans to nuke Washington. he bans Doritos? Turns out theyr’e the number one cause of cancer and natural disasters. He sends his vice president to jail? Turns out the VP was a terrorist in disguise. He has 100% approval rating, most popular president ever.
I’ve decided that I want him to be played by Jeff Goldblum.